in the darkest hour

seeping through you,
strangling through all the absence,
noone can tell how perfection kills.
countless of times you want to pull the finale,
you stop yourself because there is too much at stake.

it is worth it??
not to your imagination,
nobody will understand,
because noone can comprehend,
how lovely u look,
how much u accomplish,
yet noone bothers to know,
that what was dere was merely nothing as compared.

you know why the achievement was achieved,
the sorrow det endured,
the pain that cannot be replaced
how can you possibly explain?
you yearn for everything that was never gonna be dere,
you play the impossible,
you live like you were given the best,
or so they thought..

you feel selfish for being incontended,
for what was yours was rob away,
how can they possibly compare?
the only way that could ever matters did not.

values of your concern,
beliefs of what that does not rebel.
you think so much, u are such a loser,
why cant you just be truthful and just let loose?
yet how do you go about and start,
when you know its rather impossible to even know when is the start?

it is possible to hide away,
to run and just never face the truth?
or is it better just to conceal,
play the eye of the beholder,
play the role of perfection,
play the role of everything but not yourself.
because u were ashamed of whatever it could ve matters,
your mind are playing games,
in this darkest hour,
u fear u ll lose,
insanity arises,
or sanity kills,
in such a sad journey,
u ve to rise above.

it was never your decision,
neither your choice,
but you make the best of what you imagine,
you know nothing will help,
because all they ever care,
is how much you are of value to them,
of use, and of purpose,
of sights and of gold.

you either die rich or poor,
never the latter,you finally found love,
but is it for real?
even strangers seems sincere,
even det moment that provided was wat u r willing to sacrifice for,
just to feel a sense of true touch,or sense of self..
complicated, beyond words..
in the darkest hour,
you find its easier if you just end everything
and everything....

life goes on,
stop complaining,
but seriously can it??
angelic people come to your rescue,
and all u ever think about is how stupid they think they are,
that they will ever understand,
or they will ever come close to understanding.

how do u compare, in the 1st place there's no comparison,
u feel like even if u were played out of feelings,
it does not matter,
not like u ever care det it was real anyway,
bcuz even if so it was probably temporary,
and u dun mind sacrificing that second,
why bother to see what is the real conclusion anyway??

its better that they did so to you,
cuz rather than you hurting them
you can get over your conscience anyways,
what was not yours will never be,
and what was yours was also taken away.

maybe its time you just leave,
cuz nothing really matters anymore,
when you feel torn in between,
fake,a mirror of lesions,
life has always been a tough journey.
so u either play along or play within,
or just don't play....

leave...thats the answer,or rather a solution....

in the darkest hour.....